The Tender Will of God

Because Martin Luther was acquainted with grief, a friend asked him to write a letter to a man named Bartholomew whose wife had passed away.  This is what he wrote in the letter... 

"Let me remind you of what Job says:  'The Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away; as it seemed good to the Lord, so hath he done.'*  You should sing the same song to a dear and faithful God who gave you a dear and faithful wife and has now taken her away.  She was his before he gave her; she was his after he had given her; and she is still his (as we all are) now that he has taken her away.  Although it hurts us when he takes his own from us, his good will should be a greater comfort to us than all his gifts, for God is immeasurably better than all his gifts.  In this case his will should be esteemed more than the best wife.  Although we cannot perceive God's will as well as we can perceive a wife, we can apprehend his will by faith.  Accordingly you should cheerfully give God what is his and accept this just exchange and strange barter whereby instead of a dear, tender wife you have a dear, tender will of God- and, what is more, God himself.  How blessed and rich we would be if we could engage in such an exchange with God!  We could do so, in fact, if we knew how to, for God confronts us with the opportunity daily, but we cannot ask him."
Martin Luther
*Douay-Rheims Bible (Note: this is not a translation of the Bible that I read, but it is the translation from which Martin Luther quoted Job, so I reference it here.)  

I like to use the English Standard Version which states Job as saying, "The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD" Job 1:21b

I am thankful I have not suffered the deeply grievous loss of a child or spouse, as Martin or his friend had.  However, I find myself oft feeling grief for the loss of fellowship with family members we miss...whether by death, a move, or a lack of relationship.  
The words in this letter are very convicting, and I want to be comforted in them, because they are soo very true of my need for a better understanding of God's love for me, and His desire that I know He has sought me to be His own.  If only I could be more confident that He sustains me daily by His love.  I should desire to treasure Him most, instead of sensing a need for more relational satisfaction with those I treasure here on this earth.  The LORD is no less close.  He is Spirit. Acts 17:27-29 says, "God intended that they would seek Him and perhaps reach out for Him and find Him, though He is not far from each of us.  For in Him we live and move and have our being.' As some of your own poets have said, 'We are His offspring.'  Therefore, being offspring of God we should not think that the Divine Being is like gold or silver or stone, an image formed by man's skill and imagination..." Acts 17:27-29.   
Job suffered and wrestled with his grief and suffering, but he also worshiped and came to know the LORD better because of his grief and sorrow.   

Job later confessed... 
"I know that you can do all things, and that no purpose of yours can be thwarted.  
'Who is this that hides counsel without knowledge?'
Therefore I have uttered what I did not understand,
things too wonderful for me, which I did not know.

...
And the LORD blessed the latter days of Job more than his beginning."
Job 42:2-3, 12

Photo: Last Thursday was an unusual day, in that K was home, and the boys arrived home from work early.  So we piled up in the truck and went to Fuji Sushi for a late lunch together.  I cherish time together.  I'm more and more aware during this season how fleeting our days are together.  Thank you, Father!  

Season of Waiting and Watching

Peace does not dwell in outward things, but in the heart prepared to wait trustfully and quietly on Him who has all things safely in His hands. 
Elisabeth Elliot 

Manoah said to the angel of the LORD, "Please let us detain you and prepare a young goat for you."   
And the angel of the LORD said to Manoah, "If you detain me, I will not eat of your food.  But if you prepare a burnt offering, then offer it to the LORD."(For Manoah did not know that he was the angel of the LORD.)  
And Manoah said to the angel of the LORD, "What is your name, so that, when your words come true, we may honor you?" 
And the angel of the LORD said to him, "Why do you ask my name, seeing it is wonderful?"
So Manoah took the young goat with the grain offering, and offered it on the rock to the LORD, to the one who works wonders, and Manoah and his wife were watching.
And when the flame went up toward heaven from the altar, the angel of the LORD went up in the flame of the altar.  Now Manoah and his wife were watching, and they fell on their faces to the ground.  Judges 13:15-20  

Commentary by Matthew Henry: 
Blessed are those who have not seen, and yet, as Manoah, have believed.  Good men are more careful and desirous to know the duty to be done by them, than to know the event concerning them:  duty is ours, events are God's.  God will guide those by his counsel, who desire to know their duty, and apply to him to teach them.  Pious parents, especially, will beg Divine assistance.  The angel repeats the directions he had before given.  There is need of much care for the right ordering both of ourselves and our children, that we may be duly separate from the world, and living sacrifices to the LORD (Judges 13:8-14).  

What Manoah asked for instruction in his duty, he was readily told;  but what he asked to gratify his curiosity, was denied.  God has in his word given full directions concerning our duty, but never designed to answer other questionings.  There are secret things which belong not to us, of which we must be quite contented to be ignorant, while in the world.  The name of our Lord is wonderful and secret; but by his wonderful works he makes himself known as far as is needful for us.  Prayer is the ascent of the soul to God.  But without Christ in the heart by faith, our services are offensive smoke; in him, acceptable flame.  We may apply this to Christ's sacrifice of himself for us; he ascended in the flame of his own offering, for by his own blood he entered in once into the holy place, Hebrews 9:12.  In Manoah's reflections there is great fear; We shall surely die.  In his wife's reflection there is great faith. As a help meet for him, she encouraged him.  Let believers who have had communion with God in the word and prayer, to whom he has graciously manifested himself and who have had reason to think God has accepted their works, take encouragement from thence in a cloudy and dark day.  God would not have done what he has done for my soul, if he had designed to forsake me, and leave me to perish at last; for his work is perfect.  Learn to reason as Manoah's wife;  If God designed me to perish under his wrath, he would not give me tokens of his favor (Judges 13:15-23).   

Every Moment Holy

Here is where I am O Lord, 

I find myself drawn to one in whom I see a striking beauty of personhood,

a depth of soul,

a sensitivity to goodness and truth,

a vibrant intentionality of life and choice.  

I praise you, God, for creating such a person

and displaying in them unique expression 

of your glory.  

I thank you that my path has crossed theirs

in this time and place in history.

I am increasingly drawn to this one you have 

created, and I desire to know them more.

But I am finite and limited,

and I cannot see the path that lies ahead

on this journey toward eternity.

So give me wisdom, Lord.

Do not let my emotions get ahead of me.  

In the time that I spend with this your beloved child, 
let me not act selfishly.  Let me not take

lightly my constant responsibility for the heart

and well-being of another, regardless of the

tenor of my own feelings and desires.  

Let me remember that this relationship
does not affect only the two of us.  
It exists in that greater web of loving and sacrificial bonds of parents and grandparents, 
family and friends, who had already invested 
years of nurture and care and love and prayer
and tears and delight in the person, 
long before I ever met them.

So let me act now, 

and always in this relationship,

in ways that would honor and affirm

the tender investment of all

who love this person.  Let me build

on that good foundation,

that whatever the two of us create together

would be a blessing to all who know us.

Indeed, O Lord, give us in our shared hours

wisdom to build well,

that even if all we cultivate in partnership

is a small garden where friendship can grow,

it will still in its own humble way

be a place of encouragement and beauty

that would bring a smile and a joy to passers-by.  

Or if we awaken one day to the understanding

that what we were creating all along 

was not just a garden of friendship,

but an enduring love, 

and the foundations of a castle, 
and a tended ground where the 
remainder of our lives

and the lives of our children and grandchildren

and all of our friendships and all

of our service to you, O God,

would be lived out together in a bond

of wedded love and intimacy,

than all the more reason we should build well

and with intentionality and unselfish love

here at the beginning.  

Give me this wisdom, therefore. 

Give me this grace.

Give me patience and an eternal perspective 

that would govern well my choices today,

and in all the days to follow.  

Do not let my emotions

get ahead of me, O Lord.

Let me love you by loving this person well,

and in kindness and self-restraint

let me always choose their greatest good

as if it were my own.  
Amen.  

From:  Every Moment Holy, A Liturgy for Dating or Courtship

By: Douglas Kaine McKelvey

This season has been very emotional, but sweet! 
I am thankful for the LORD drawing me to Himself, that I might know Him in the waiting  and praying for His will to be accomplished in our lives and hearts.  

Their lives, their hearts. 

Ohhh, LORD, may we be comforted and delighted to know...
The heart of man plans his way,
but the LORD establishes his steps. 
Proverbs 16:9

Photo: K❤️L

Holy Marriage Legacy

Home is the foundation upon which great civilizations are built.  It is the sacred dwelling where souls are forged, humans have great value, children are cherished, and marriage is regarded as holy.  
Sally Clarkson

Meme and Poppy recently celebrated their 64th wedding anniversary while he was in the hospital recovering from a gall bladder infection.  He had been in the hospital the week before w/heart issues, went home, then returned four days later w/abdominal and chest pains.  Needless to say, we are all thankful for another day together!!  Whether it's at home or in the hospital, every day is a gift to celebrate.  

Thank you, Father, for helping Meme and Poppy with faith and love to endure in their marriage for 64 years, for the good and ongoing benefit of displaying your sacrificial love for the Church.  We as 2nd, 3rd, and 4th generations of Clelands are sooo very BLESSED!  We are soo very thankful!  

Many Letting Goes

"There is no ongoing spiritual life without this process of letting go.  At the precise point where we refuse, growth stops.  If we hold tightly to anything given to us, unwilling to let it go when the time comes to let it go or unwilling to allow it to be used as the Giver means it to be use, we stunt the growth of the soul.  It is easy to make a mistake here, "If God gave it to me," we say, "it's mine.  I can do what I want with it."  No.  The truth is that it is ours to thank Him for and ours to offer back to Him, ours to relinquish, ours to lose, ours to let go of- if we want to find our true selves, if we want real life, if our hearts are set on glory."  
Elisabeth Elliot, Passion and Purity:  Learning to Bring Your Love Life Under Christ's Control